Oh, Depensa!

I deleted the original post a week ago.

I deemed it necessary to think things over (which is a rare thing that I do); rather than react quickly to the problem at hand. The problem, which is about love, is not a problem of mine. It is, however, a problem of someone close to me - of whom I have been a confidant of hers. Naming names would do no good, but may, in some point, do more harm to what has already happened (if you do know her, please [1] dont mention her name on your comments and [2] dont ever show this to her parents - they do not have multiply accounts. I rather avoid conflict with them right now.)

So, this is for you. :)

*fist bump*

Though I need, still, to hear your side of the story - it has been a busy month for us both.

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Scenario:

Girl X is the second of only two daughters of a well to do family. Coming from a sheltered life - she is alien to the idea of commuting (recently she just learned to ride a tricycle), manual work, and well protected from the harsh reality of our country (hunger, violence, politicking, etc). Her life is already planned and, in some way, controlled by her parents.

Then comes love.

Love - an inevitable event in everyone's life that will come in a time no one expects and no one can stop. Being more friendly and more approachable than her sibling, she naturally fell for someone that was (or still is) close to her.

Unfortunately, her parents and, even, her grandparent got wind of this that they pressured her, to put it mildly, to break up with the boy - which she did, though against her own will.

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The following arguments which I just heard over dinner between my aunt and her parents are the arguments placed before her in her parents attempt to end her relationship - 

NB: I am still not THAT certain if these were the things that was told to her since I haveny confirmed it face to face with [1] her or [2] her parents.

[1] "Anak naman, ang pagkakaroon ng boyfriend ay nakakasira sa pagaaral."

Says who? Pulse Asia? AC Nielsen? or Google? er, Wiki?

Come on now. Yeah sure, there are no studies either that would claim that the other side of the coin is real - but hey, maybe people that does survey think that this has no significance at all. That there is no real relationship between one's grades and one's social aptitude.

It basically boils down to the person in question - if s/he will study and make the relationship as a inspiration to study harder or to waste her academics life in favor of "love" which is not love at all.

The parents' role is to guide, not control, their children in making decisions with regards to their child's relationship - since it is their child who is engaged/committed in that relationship. The children, on the other hand, should be open to their parents about this relationship - moreover, if it is their first.

[2] "Anak alam ko na ang patutunguhan niyan. Masasaktan ka lang."

I remember a quote from somewhere "When you love, be ready to be hurt."

If the story doesn't have a fairy tale ending, it doesn't follow that it will have a worst case ending. It doesn't follow that a perfect relationship doesn't have it's own ups and downs. 

Problems, challenges, hindrances in our life's journey helps us a better person - thus making them a necessity in life, even in love. Shielding someone from these negativities - doesnt help them, it actually makes them more vulnerable to bigger challenges that may come later in life. 

Plus, not even Nostradamus could predict what could happen in your child's relationship.

[3] "Anak, ako nga eh nakalusot ng college at naging successful ng walang nagiging karelasyon nung college"

So, they should take the same road that you took? 

Even if you give her the same name, she is not and will not be the same person as you.

Again there is no sufficient evidence that having a relationship in college will make you fail later in life. :)

[4] "Anak pag di ka nakipag break dyan sa <school in our province> ka na lang mag aaral."

Btw, she studies at a prestigious school that starts with the letter R - The R'neo. :p

No comment na lang. Lupit eh.

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PS 

The suicide joke you made was terrible.

Isang malaking kagaguhan yun. 

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So there. Comment, suggest, and react. :)

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Quotes of the Day:

[1] "Parang sinigang lang yan. Kung binigyan ka ng sabaw, di mo ba kakainin ang laman?" - Christian Niño Diaz (alam na :p )

[2] "Eto ang karera na ayokong mauna." - Kalayaan Nicandor Quiñones (up for grabs ang bronze medal.)

[3] "Basta pangit masungit." - Uncle ni Voltz.(lupit)

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Side Notes:

[1] Welcome to the Christian World! Kenjie Lorenzo Montalbo and William Andre Ignacio :)

[2] Salamat kay Pao at Ianne sa carpool :) 

[3] Para sa plastic dyan - LOL. Kainin mo ang sinabi mo. Rawr.