Disconnected.

It's been years.

A couple of weeks most probably, since I wrote something on my multiply account. Work schedule has nothing to with it though.

Our very reliable ISP, Smart Bro(ken) suddenly got disconnected amidst the thunder and lightning of one rainy day in Katipunan. I reckon, at first, that it would be back after a day or two. But, after four days of waiting, I decided to call Smart CustoServe. For the nth time, my call couldn't get through. Until my patience snapped, due to lack of my recommended daily internet dosage, and I went to Smart Wireless Center at SM North. I inquired about the problem and they told me that maybe we got disconnected because we still haven't settled last month's balance. So I got some cash and paid for it, then advised the girl I've talk with beore that I've settled the balance and asked her when our internet would be connected again. She informed me that it would take a day or two. Ayos, I told myself. But after a week, we still can't connect to the net. And calling CustoServe is like writing your thesis on water. Useless. Futile. I hope my brother could get through the useless service.

A week after I got my first paycheck, I went back home to Lipa. It was a trip I was looking forward to. I get to relax back at home, away from the complex routines and everyday truckload of stress. It was, coindentally, my mother's birthday too. So along the way, I called her up to greet a happy birthday, and told her that I would be buying pasta, some bread, and a couple of litro drinks to celebrate her birthday back at my lola's house. I expected my aunt to be there with my cousins, so I bought a big Red Ribbon party pan spaghetti. It was a good day to celebrate a birthday, the sun was up, it wasn't that hot (well that's Lipa's climate I guess), and I got to give something back to my mom, somehow. Wel, that is until I found out that my aunt and cousins wouldn't be coming over because they had a lunch scheduled that day. So I got to eat the spaghetti with my other uncle, my neighbors, and the helpers. Oh well. It's the thought that counts.

Me: "Citiphone, this is Raymond. How may I help you?"
Cardholder: "Uh, Jay?!

Shit. It happens almost ten friggin' time everyday. Ang layo ng Raymond sa Jay! The funny thing is the other daym instead of Jay, the cardholder said, "uh, ian?"

Uh, about work. The good news is that I got a new schedule. I'll be logged on from 7am to 4pm. That's about the same time that I get up to go to school and come back home. It's good because, I get to rest earlier and somehow get back in time for the evening news. And this schedule would enable me to take MA next semester, that is, if I get to save some money. The bad news, on the other hand, is that I wanted to quit already. I have three reasons why I wanted to quit:

1. Endless Cycle of Foolishness. Everyday, I get to put on a fake smile (at least on my voice) and greet the stupid, idiotic cardholders, as if they were my master. And no matter how clear I explain to them the solution to their problem, they would always press on their hate for our bank's hidden charges, which are in fact clearly stated and explained on the application form and card's terms and conditions. And I would, as far as my patience would hold, apologize to them. Apologize that God gave them so small a brain that they can't comprehend why they breathe. I wanted to end all of this crap.
2. Attitude Driven. I remember a message sent by our Group Head, that work should be faced with a positive attitude. I tried to do it by the first week of my log. But somehow I felt like Harry Potter surrounded by dementors who suck every drop of happiness and sanity in my mind, from the idiotic and irate card holders to Über kupal officemates to crap work policies. Positive attitude in our work is hard to come by these days.
3. This is not ME. Before graduation I preconditioned my sub conscious that I wouldn't work for a call center or anything to do with a conversation with someone else over the phone. But lo and behold, I am included in the call center employee statistic. I sourgrape and repeat it over and over inside my head that I took this job to save money for my master's. But sourgraping wouldn't change reality. It would change the fact that I hate this kind of job. This is not what I planned in my life, given some calculated risks here and there. I envy my other officemate would had some courage to resign after 7 months of working in the same company. He told me that he never really liked this kind of work. He never found any kind of satisfaction. Somehow, I wish I could muster enough courage too. I guess I have to devise an escape plan, and a Plan B.

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thanks to Lis (*hug*) for letting me use their PC for this entry.

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By the way, I would like to apologize to Mirza for trashtalking his game. Damn. He burned Ateneo during the last game. 6/7from rainbow country?! Coach Pido must have cried during the game, because both of joy and disbelief. hahaha